Back in 2000, I was playing Peter in Edward Albee's play "The Zoo Story" in LA - Hollywood specifically. The Director liked to play a song for the cast before rehearsal to relax us, transport us and sort of prepare us to drop our own human issues and struggles, let go and play our roles.
He would have us find a comfortable spot on the stage or somewhere in the theatre to lie down on our backs. Then he turned off the lights and had us close our eyes and just listen to the music and the lyrics of a song he had chosen for that particular rehearsal.
I was going through a really difficult and rocky relationship that I knew was coming to an end but was having so much difficulty letting go. One day at rehearsal he played "Kite" by U2 and I couldn't stop weeping softly, quietly and almost silently to myself.
I was weeping in part because I was breaking through my own denial with the realization that I needed to let go. But also, in part, because the lyrics changed my perspective on the process of letting go.
Instead of thinking that I was the one that needed to let go, the lyrics suggested and allowed me put the focus on the other person letting me go. This was extremely powerful for me because it helped me to feel less vulnerable in my loss, less like I was the one that needed to let go and more like I was giving permission for someone to let go of me.
So now I'm thinking of how hard it is for me to let go of Desi and realizing again that, maybe, I need to give Desi permission to let go of me . . . I'm not really sure. But maybe...
Bono sings in the lyrics of this song: "I want you to know that you don't need me anymore . . . you don't need anyone or anything at all". To me, that sort of shifts the focus and equalizes the process of letting go somehow.
Songs and plays are really poems set to music and meter so the poetry of the lyrics combined with the music and Bono's voice in this live version fuse together to relay the experience of letting go in a poetic way that allows each listener to have their own unique perspective and experience.
Bono introduces this song with these words:
"This song's about letting go of somebody you don't wanna let go of - it could be a lover, it could be a father, it could be a child, it could be a friend, I don't know. This is 'Kite' . . ."
Something is about to give
I can feel it coming
I think I know what it means
I'm not afraid to die
I'm not afraid to live
And when I'm flat on my back
I hope to feel like I did
And hardness, it sets in
You need some protection, the thinner the skin
I want you to know
That you don't need me anymore
I want you to know
You don't need anyone or anything at all
Who's to say where the wind will take you?
Who's to say what it is will break you?
I don't know which way the wind will blow
Who's to know when the time has come around?
Don't wanna see you cry
I know that this is not goodbye
In summer, I can taste the salty sea
There's a kite blowing out of control on a breeze
I wonder what's gonna happen to you
You wonder what has happened to me
I'm a man
I'm not a child
A man who sees
The shadow behind your eyes
Who's to say where the wind will take you?
Who's to say what it is will break you?
I don't know where the wind will blow
Who's to know when the time has come around?
I don't wanna see you cry
I know that this is not goodbye
Did I waste it?
Not so much I couldn't taste it
Life should be fragrant
Rooftop to the basement
The last of the rock stars
When hip-hop drove the big cars
In the time when new media
Was the big idea
That was the big idea
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